Saint Nick and Our Guest

 This past Tuesday (December 6^th) we celebrated St. Nicholas Day and I was remembering the St. Nick party that we hosted at our house last year.  We were looking at the calendar for a date to invite a friend up for dinner and when we settled on the date we realized that it was the weekend before St. Nicholas Day. We changed the dinner into a theme party and invited our children and grandchildren as well as a few friends. As everyone came in they removed a shoe and placed it under a small tree that I had set up. I told the legend of St. Nicholas and the children waited ’patiently’ for St. Nick to fill their shoes.

It just happened that my husband, John, had an artist reception scheduled for that evening at a local eatery where his work was being displayed. The management had already sent out postings and invitations so we juggled the two events by starting our party there.  Our family, a number of friends and previous customers attended this event and John needed to stay until the end. The rest of us returned home to set out the meal.

A short while later he called home to say one last person had arrived at the reception just as he was leaving.  The late arrival was a woman that we both knew from games on Facebook but had never met. She heard about the art reception and drove a distance to attend.  Unfortunately, she got lost along the way and missed the event. John felt bad that she had driven all that distance just to turn around and go back home.  He walked back into the building, showed her the artwork and then invited her to come to dinner back at our house where we were hosting the St. Nick party for our family and friends.  

At first I was a little annoyed; this was an intimate family party. In essence my husband was bringing home a stranger that he’d met online, a practice that we caution our children and grandchildren against. He’s usually a good judge of character but it’s easy to be fooled, especially during the holiday season.  Upon introduction she seemed very comfortable, we all chatted; she had a drink and something to eat with us, watched as the kids examined the treats in their shoes and then sat down and read a book to our grandson. 

When it was time for her to leave John led her back to the main road so she wouldn’t get lost.

I’ve thought about this night quite often during the past year and I’ve had a few ‘AHA!’ moments.  There was a lot of theological significance in that night that I missed.   It was St. Nicholas Day and St. Nick, like Jesus, would have made sure that she was fed and made comfortable and welcome.  When I think back on that night I can see that John was preparing the way in the true spirit of Advent; while I stood back being doubtful. “For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me…” (Mt25:35).  I think I missed the message here.

The wonderful thing about God is that we’re always given a second chance if we ask.  During this reflective season of Advent are you taking the opportunity to help prepare the way for the Savior?  

Smile!

Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.  ~Mother Teresa

What makes you smile? In my New Year’s blog, “Read, Eat Fruit and Smile,” I vowed to try to smile more.  It seemed like a simple act at the time but three week later I found out that I was one of 90 people who would be losing their job in April. With that hanging over my head, I found less and less to smile about. Of course we all laughed and made sarcastic jokes about our situations but the occasions for truly smiling were scarce. After April, my smiles were nervous or affected ones. While it was necessary to maintain a positive outlook, the future was very uncertain.  I realized that, after 23 years at the same company, my world had been turned upside down. I needed a purpose to get going every morning. I started going to daily Mass. After a few days my smile returned. It’s impossible to sit in the presence of the Lord and not smile. Combine that with a good homily and I’m ready to face the day with purpose.

One of my friends from church mentioned that she goes to a pay as you go exercise class that’s held Tuesday through Friday. When I was working I was a regular at our on-site gym so this was definitely something that I missed. I decided to try out the classes. One day while facing the mirror during a dance type class I remembered a previous aerobics instructor who used to tell everyone to look in the mirror to make sure you were smiling.  If not then the class would get harder! I smiled just remembering that instructor’s wisdom. Exercise doesn't seem so grueling if you smiled.

Since my husband and I were both home (him working at home and me trying to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up) soon realized that we were chatting more than working. Fun? Yes. Productive? No.  Unfortunately, the bills still needed to be paid. We decided to reserve all of our daily talking to the evening. Then, while enjoying a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, we sat down and discussed our days. I noticed that during this relaxing time we weren’t only smiling but we were doing a lot of laughing together.

Four months later, I still don’t have a job but I am smiling more these days. I’ve found a renewed balance. My spirituality is stronger because of my ability to attend Mass daily, I’m healthier because of the daily exercise class and the nightly chats with my husband has reduced stress and refreshed our 30+ years of marriage. It seems true that every cloud has a silver lining and that’s something to smile about!

SMILE!

“Why do you seek the living among the dead?”

This Sunday began the most important week in the Christian calendar, a week that has been depicted in various media throughout the years.  Movies such as Jesus of Nazareth, The Passion of Christ and the Greatest Story Ever Told all tell the powerful story of Christ’s passion and death. In printed media there are books such as Six Hours One Friday by Max Lucado, The Trial and Death of Jesus Christ by James Stalker and The Easter Story, a version for children. Successful Broadway shows such as Godspell and Jesus Christ Superstar still run every year and Churches all over the world put on various versions of the Passion Play or Living Stations.

This year and probably all of my remaining years, this week will have a special meaning to me. Last October I visited Israel and actually walked in some of the places where Jesus walked during those last few days. We started our trip in Tiberius and then moved on to Jerusalem. The bus driver announced it as we entered the city.  When we arrived we attended Mass at the Chapel at Bethphage, the wall behind the altar has a beautiful depiction of Jesus' entry into Jerusalem.  As I stood in Mass yesterday holding up my palm to be blessed, I remembered that painting with all the people welcoming Jesus and waving palm branches. It’s amazing how fast their attitude changed.

As I sit at Mass on Holy Thursday I will have a clear picture of the room in Mount Zion which is believed to be the Upper Room, the room where Jesus and his Apostles celebrated His last supper. The room where He commissioned Judas to do what must be done. This is also the place that He returned to after His Resurrection.  As we have exposition and quiet contemplation after Mass, I’ll remember quietly walking through the Garden at Gethsemane with its beautiful olive trees yet an air of great sorrow. Could I stay awake and pray with Jesus or like the Apostles would I let exhaustion overcome me?

On Friday as I pray, I’ll recall standing in little damp cell where they held Jesus captive, left hanging on the wall awaiting his trial. I’ll remember walking along The Via Dolorosa (The Way of the Cross). We stopped at each of the stations along the way for a moment of prayer and reflection.  As we made our way through the crowded streets we were heckled and spit upon because we didn’t want to purchase anything, we just wanted to quietly pray. Jesus went through this on a much grander scale by the very people that he was there to save.

As I walked up the steps to the place where the cross once stood, I felt an overwhelming sadness. Although it’s now part of a Church this was once the hill where Jesus suffered and died, where blood and water poured from his body, where he spoke the words,”It is finished.”  I will be thinking about this as I attend the Good Friday service.

When I entered the tomb of Jesus in Holy Sepulcher church, I expected to feel something, a presence maybe, or a whisper of what was contained within. But I didn’t feel much of anything. It was disappointing, not the mystical experience that I was expecting. I attributed it to spending over an hour in line waiting and then being quickly herded in and out without time to dwell on what had taken place there. However, as Easter approaches, I wonder if I experienced nothing because nothing was there. Jesus is no longer in a tomb He is in our hearts. “Why do you seek the living among the dead?” With that in mind, when the bells resound and we sing the Gloria at the Easter Vigil, I will do so with joy because I know that Jesus has truly risen and will live in my heart forever.

An Inspirational Evening

Yesterday I had the opportunity to experience a wonderfully inspirational Lenten program. I attended a concert by Tony Melendez. If you have ever seen this man perform then I need say no more, the performance speaks for itself.  But for those of you who are unfamiliar with him let me give some background. Tony is a singer and guitarist who uses his talents to praise God and bring inspiration to others. You’re probably thinking that there are a lot of good Christian musicians out there that do that. And you are right.  So what makes this one so inspirational?

 Tony has no arms. He is one of approximately 10,000 Thalidomide babies; babies born with severe limb defects due to a drug administered to pregnant women for morning sickness. He plays his guitar, beautifully, I might add, with his feet.

I first saw him perform about fifteen years ago when three of my then teenaged children were involved in the Catholic Youth Organization (CYO). Youth and young adults and children with disabilities are high on his list of ministries. His concert was quite memorable so when I heard that our diocese was sponsoring several concerts at area churches I bought tickets.  For the cost of my ticket, I laughed, I cried, I sang and I praised God.

If you look at Tony’s bio on his website, a sidebar states “Loves God, Loves his Family, Loves Music, Loves Life.” He exhibited all four of these loves in the two hours that he performed today.  The concert opened up with a rendition of Paul Baloche’s Open the Eyes of My Heart.  The words were written on a video screen and everyone was encouraged to not only sing along but to actually feel the meaning of the words, to experience that awakening of God’s love in us. He clearly shares his love of God.

Loves Family. He speaks lovingly of his family and the sacrifice that they made, leaving their home in Nicaragua to seek medical care for him when he was a child; and of his wife and their two adopted children. His brother Jose travels with him and together they formed a partnership called Toe Jam Music. He considers all the people in his company as family as well as the audiences that listen to him sing and play his guitar.

Loves Music. Tony has been blessed with a beautiful voice and the unique ability to play the guitar with his feet.  His face lights up as entertains and inspires people. As you watch him play you realize that this is much more than a man playing a guitar with his feet. This is an artist with a true love for the music he shares.

Loves Life. As he plays he also gives an insight into his life. As a small child he didn’t even realize that he didn’t have arms. At least not until he went to school and the other children pointed it out. As a teenager and a young man he hoped for a girlfriend but most girls were intimidated by his lack of arms. He feels very blessed to have found his wife. He has an enthusiasm and a positive energy about him that   most only dream about. 

Tony Melendez should be an inspiration to us all. We could all be better people if we just followed his example. Love God, it’s all He asks of us.  It’s not much and it’s not that hard to do. Love your Family, for better or worse they are yours, cherish them. Extend yourself to your larger family, mankind. If you give them a chance most of them can be pretty special too. Love Music, whether it’s a hymn or an old rock and roll tune that brings back a memory, music speaks to hearts.  Take the time to listen. Love Life, it is a precious gift that we’ve been given.  Embrace every moment.  Take the time and effort to turn adversity into grace. And, if you’ve been blessed with arms, realize how lucky you are. Use them for good and never forget to hug those you love. Just because you can!

Giving, Not Giving Up

We’re heading into the third week of Lent, a season of sacrifice, penitence and reflection. It’s usually marked by fasting and abstinence. As I Catholic I’m called to fast twice during the season, on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday and to abstain from eating meat on Fridays. In addition, most people will also give up something dear to them: chocolate, sweets, cigarettes, swearing, etc.  One of the more common phrases you’ll hear is “What are you giving up for Lent?” No, giving up the vegetable that you hate does not count!  Additionally, many will try to do something positive: extra prayer, giving more to the poor, reading the Bible, even just smiling more when you really don’t feel like it. My one daughter listens only to inspirational music during Lent.

Last year, in Chaos and the Lenten Season, I told you that my positive and productive thing would be to restore order to my office.  I even included a humbling picture. The office was made neater but during the year  the year I watched the open space fill in again as this , that and the other thing found it’s temporary home in that room. If cleanliness is next to Godliness then this room is still a few miles away! So what to do this year that would be more in the spirit of the Lenten season?

As I looked around me, I realized that there is a lot of suffering going on. How many times have we said, “I’ll keep you in my prayers?” Then we say a quick prayer for that person and move on, obligation done. By the middle of January I realized that I had said this numerous times already this year. Knowing that I couldn’t possibly remember all of these intentions, I starting writing them down in a ‘prayer journal’.  

As I said my morning prayers, I visualize the journal page and pray for all included.  I have three friends with close relatives battling cancer, two with relatives fighting kidney disease, someone struggling with serious bouts of depression, friends who are dealing with long-term unemployment and an elderly couple trying to spend their last moments together while one suffers with heart disease and the other is in the end-stages of cancer.  I haven’t even touched on the trials of my own immediate family. Prayers are powerful and I’m sure that the recipients feel God’s healing presence. Sometimes all we can do is put our troubles in God’s hands; but are there other times when we could be doing more to help those in need as well as those who care for them? As soon as disaster strikes, e.g. hurricanes, earthquakes, tornadoes, etc., we’re usually willing to send to donations or supplies for the cause.  But what about your family member who’s struggling with illness or the neighbor down the street who just lost a spouse? Is there a small comfort that we could extend? The opportunity for grace is all around us.

During this Lenten season why not take the opportunity to reach out to someone that you know is hurting.  Invite them into your home to share a meal or a cup of coffee; maybe take a meal to their home for the family to share. Ask how they’re feeling, most people suffer in silence, simply because no one asks, it’s too uncomfortable. Offer to run an errand for them, maybe pick up some groceries. We all know someone who could benefit from a friendly gesture.  Be that person who extends themselves and then bask in God’s grace and blessing.  You’ll face Easter with a whole new perspective.

March for Life

Last weekend marked the 38^th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, the court decision that legalized abortion. This event is memorialized each year with The March for Life, a peaceful protest calling for the repeal of this disastrous decision. On Monday I had the opportunity to attend the Rally and March with my daughter, son-in-law and his brother, two granddaughters and two grandsons.

My 11 yr old granddaughter and I left NJ on Sunday afternoon and spent the night with my daughter and her family (husband and 3 children aged 7 months, 2 ½ and 5 years) in PA. The next morning we took off for DC around 5am to meet up with my son-in-law’s brother, a Franciscan friar. After attending Mass and enjoying the hospitality of the priests and brothers at the Friary we took off for the Rally. We walked to the Metro, took two trains (while wheeling 2 strollers) and finally arrived as the events were starting. We acquired our signs and moved in to hear the speakers. The expected hour and a half of speeches lasted almost 4 hours in below freezing weather. About 3 hours into it we went into the Art Museum to thaw out the kids who by now were reaching the Popsicle stage.   

As we were preparing to leave the museum we got word that the rally was over and people were lining up for the March. We quickly bundled back up and headed out to take our place in line. When you’re walking with small children and pushing strollers it’s difficult to keep a place in large group so we found ourselves drifting in and out of the different groups.  There were approximately 200,000 people marching that afternoon, people who lived nearby and people who had travelled all night by bus to get there.  There was an impressive amount of young people carrying signs promoting themselves as being the pro-life generation.  That gave me a lot of hope for the future.

As we made our way down the street, I heard one surrounding group praying the Rosary, another, the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. Other groups were drumming and singing hymns and songs of praise and worship while others were making up pro-life chants. Some were quiet, probably engaging in personal prayer. I found myself saying a Hail Mary with this group, a little of the Chaplet with another group, singing a familiar hymn or song and yes even jumping in on the chants and dancing to the drums. But most of all I watched my family as we marched together for a common cause, respect for life, all life. I thank God everyday for the wonderful family that He’s given me, a family willing to brave the freezing temperatures for a cause that they believe in.

 

When the March ended, we made our way back to the Metro.  Two trains and short walk later we were back to the Friary where we had left the car. It was now rush hour in DC and we were all tired.   The Friars, who had made extra food since they had guests staying with them, invited us to come in, refresh ourselves and share their meal. Eventually we made our way back to my daughter’s in Harrisburg.  My granddaughter and I switched to my car and drove back to NJ.  It was a long cold day but I’ll remember and hope that my grandchildren will as well.

I would like to express my thanks to the priests and brothers at the St. Louis Friary in DC.  Your hospitality was incredibly generous and welcoming.  God Bless!

Read, Eat Fruit and Smile!

Happy New Year!

My wish is for a happy and healthy 2011 for all of my friends and family.

Resolutions! Are you a resolution person? Have you spent the day making lists and promising yourself that this will be the year that …. (fill in the blank)? Although it’s good to have goals (without them we probably wouldn’t even get out of bed in the morning), history has proven that we usually don’t keep our New Year resolutions.  We set the bar too high and set ourselves up for failure.

I stopped making resolutions years ago but I do take inventory every year. I look at what I’ve accomplished or what I’ve learned and how I’ve challenged myself.  Then I consider what I can do to improve myself in the upcoming year.  

My husband was listening to talk radio the other day and the host proposed the following question: “What will you try to improve this year, your mind, your body or your spirit?” Of course, with my holistic way of thinking, I immediately started to ponder on how I could improve all three.

I’ve always been an avid reader but in recent years my computer time has replaced a lot of my reading time.  To improve my mind I’m going to try to read a book a week. This will probably cut down on my computer time but might also keep my brain from turning to mush.

As for my body, I’ll continue to try to improve on my diet.  I usually eat healthfully and have no trouble incorporating vegetables in most of my meals.  However, I find that I’m often lacking in fruit servings. So I’ll start by trying to eat at least one piece of fruit a day. I know that this probably sounds strange since most people have more trouble with vegetables than with fruits.

What can I do to improve my spirit? This required a little more thought.  There were a lot of areas where I could improve. However, I wanted something powerful enough to make a difference but not so overwhelming that I set myself up for defeat. Then it hit me! I could smile more! I remembered that when I was in Israel, Fr. David frequently looked at me and said “smile.” I wasn’t unhappy I just tend to have a serious look.  I have a friend/co-worker who is always saying “watch out for her she has the look today.” I know exactly what look she means too.  I’ve seen it in photographs. Sometimes when I’m lost in thought I can look downright mean. Smiling more will definitely improve that image as well as my spirit!

Hopefully I’ll improve myself in mind, body and spirit this year but not with resolutions that will be cast aside in a month.  I’ll make slight improvements daily by just remembering my new mantra, “Read , Eat Fruit and Smile”!